I eluded once before that we spent our honeymoon in the jungles of the tropics, with his sister and his friend. I promised to talk about that and haven’t fulfilled that promise. Since I’m usually good with keeping promises, here’s the recap of what happened 7+ years ago.

Our wedding took place in Malaysia, where Hubby was born and grew up. As with most destination weddings, not many people showed up (on my side). This was also the first time I meet my in-laws and where parents from both sides met for the first time as well.

Malaysia is right on the equator. In fact, the town that Hubby’s from sits 1 degree from the equator and has a humidity of 95% every single day. It’s ~90F everyday of the year. Did I mention there are LOTS AND LOTS of mosquitoes?! And no screened windows??? Not fun, especially when you’re super allergic to mosquitoes and swell up like a balloon when bitten.

There were exactly 170 people in our wedding, and I could count the number of guests I knew with all the fingers on exactly one hand. I don’t blame my friends; I wouldn’t be traveling 32+ hours by flight for a wedding unless (1) you’re one of my kidneys (2) I could afford to pay the hefty air ticket (3) I want to travel to that part of the world anyways and what would be cooler than to kill two birds with one stone.

The wedding ceremony was at 8 a.m. which meant I had to get up at 5 a.m. to get ready. The makeup lady came to the hotel to do my hair and makeup. I sat half asleep while she poked and prodded my hair and got me dressed. (The church was all booked up and the only time slot available was 8 a.m. 09-09 is a very popular date.)

After the ceremony, we had the Chinese-Malaysian reception with extended family members at his parents’ house. At 7p.m. the real wedding reception started and where I knew basically no one in my own wedding. After the glorious 8-course meal is over and almost everyone leaves, except for one of Hubby’s friend who he hadn’t seen for many years. He came up to our penthouse wedding suite in the hotel and chatted for hours. He finally left after I literally kicked him out. By then I had been up for 20+ hours and you know what I did on my wedding night? I fell on the bed and conked out.

What a great start to a marriage.

After all that wonderfulness, we flew to Mulu for a few days. Without blaming him again and mentioning how unhappy I was with this arrangement again, Hubby’s sister and one of his friends came along with us. Since the friend and his sister aren’t a couple, and sister felt odd sharing a room with a strange man, she stayed in our room. I’m not making this up. This sort of thing simply cannot be made up.

So over the course of the next few days, we did a lot of activities together with them. Together. We hiked trails, we swam in the pool, we had yummy meals, we went to amazing caves, we went kayaking, we watched cultural shows. Together.

It was a really fun place, honestly it was. I mean JUST LOOK AT this cave. Yes that’s a freaking ROAD in the middle there, a ROAD that can accommodate at least 3 people walking side by side. Here’s another shot of the same cave. The cavity of this cave supposedly can hold up to FOUR 747 wingless planes side by side (I think it’s 4). Wow. And this was not the only cave… The place was beyond beautiful. Aside from the breathtaking natural beauty of this place, there were NO MOSQUITOES here because of the bats living in these caves. See bat exodus images here, here, and here. Millions and millions of bats live here.

But I think it would have been way more fun if we didn’t have 2 tag-a-longs.

He’s lucky I didn’t leave, or leave him.

If you feel bad for me, and are inclined to, please email me to find out how to contribute to my Real Honeymoon Fund. Or at least give him a swift whack on the head.