Wednesday, June 28th, 2006
This happened in the not-so-distant past when all 4 of us were bogged down with colds and whatnots for months and months.
I was driving down the highway, with my two small children in the vehicle. And suddenly the baby sneezes, and I KNOW there’s a trail of colorful snot running down into her mouth. There’s no other adults in the car and my toddler son isn’t close enough to help wipe it away.
Boogers and snots aren’t the worst things kids ingest. Right??? ICK.
Sure enough, when I parked the car shortly after, the passageway between her nose and lips was clean as a whistle.
Saturday, June 10th, 2006
I got this in my inbox recently. It's in the same line as the previous post where I vented. Hope you find it as amusing as I did. Just to clarify, Hubby does not fit into this mold. Well, not often anyway. 
I wonder if I should email it to my friend who says SAHM is an easy job. Ah maybe not . . maybe someday she will realize and reframe her thinking.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard.
The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house and there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.
In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious had happened. He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.
As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel.
She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?"
She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world did I do today?"
"Yes," was his incredulous reply.
She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hats off to all you SAHMs. Have a few bonbons and sit and watch some TV as your reward. Or head off to the spa. Do something, whatever makes you feel good and relaxed.
Tuesday, June 6th, 2006
Not so long ago an old childhood friend visited us. It was the first time in more than 10 years since we last saw each other. We were good friends back then. She has a very kind heart and I adore her for that.
It was sort of fun to catch up and see how we've evolved and changed. She's a single mom to an almost 10-year-old (she got pregnant back in high school and the deadbeat dad didn't stick around). Despite that, with her mom's help in caring for her child, she managed to finish her degree and has a pretty good paying job.
It was also awkward and got downright uncomfortable toward the end of the morning. Sometimes people drift apart because of personality differences, or distance, or other circumstances, or simply over time. I don't know which one applies to us, probably all of the above, but our relationship have definitely drifted from where it was before.
She works outside the home. She's single. She goes bar hopping. She parties. She exercises. She wears make-up and have highlights in her totally black hair and wears high heels. She still live in the same town and drops her kid off at her mom's for the entire weekend. Every. Single. Weekend. She's still a kind hearted person and I think her core values have not changed at all, but she and I have nothing much in common. It's hard to bond and connect when you don't have much in common with someone. It's kind of sad realizing we'll never be close again.
During our get-together, she said not only once but several times, of how easy I have it because I'm staying at home with the children and don't have to work [outside of the house]. I truly resent that statement. Anyone who's ever stayed home full time with a 9-month and a 34-month old knows that life isn't easy. And anyone who lives far far away from either side of the family (meaning, without any help from families) knows that it's pretty damn hard taking care of children by all your lonesome self and hubby.
Does she think I sit on the couch watching TV and eat bon bons all day long while the children are feeding and playing all by themselves? While we're at it, why, I have children who know how to change their own diapers and who clean after themselves too. How about while the laundry and floor and dishes all magically gets cleaned by the Chore Fairy? And meals appear on demand with the Replicator from Star Trek? Yeap. Sounds like my Stay-At-Home (SAH) Life to me. That's what I do. And yes, both of my little darlings sleep through the night for 12 hours straight without a peep.
OK that sleep part is not true.
But all the other ones are (and if you believe that, you're NOT paying attention).
Seriously. WHY in the world would she say to me, repeatedly, that staying at home is EASY compared to her desk job? And what does she know about taking care of children? She goes to work for a big chunk of the day, and drops the kid off every single weekend at her moms. Let's not forget her child is nearly 10 years old — much more independent than my two. As if that's not enough, she kept on insisting that my SAH Life is easier than her Career Life, even after I point out the facts to her and after I remind her that we have NO family nearby for babysittings.
And she isn't the first one to say this to me. It's just she's the first one to tell me face to face. Over and over and over. In the end, I gave up and stopped arguing. After all, most people, myself included aren't always fully capable of appreciating something unless they have walked in the same shoes.
Incidentally, I used to think staying at home taking care of children was easy. I didn't even think of it as a "job". A job is where you get all dressed and ready and drive somewhere. A job is where you actually get paid to do things. I used to think like that. Now I know better. Now I know when you have no help from families and you don't hire babysitters and you're doing it 24/7, Every Single Day, it's downright hard. It's like I have 4 full time jobs: Mommy x 2, Wife, Maid. Not only do I not get paid for any of it, I don't get to take breaks whenever I want / need to.
Really thankless jobs. However, I get paid in hugs, slobbery kisses and paint-stained clothes. I think I will manage just fine. Just don't tell me how easy it is [compared to your "Working Life"].
Sunday, June 4th, 2006
I've been thinking about this, and how I want to proceed with it.
As I've mentioned before, our neighborhood has almost a dozen of babies under 4 years old (all of whom are boys, except for our little girl). There is another baby arriving soon. And there is a baby shower, hosted by the sister-in-law who also live in the same neighborhood (and has 2 boys herself). This will be that family's first baby. All of us are on neighborly terms, meaning, we have nothing in common with any of these people except for the fact that our kids are in the same age group. Nothing at all. But the ones who do have children on occasion do get together for playdates. The question is, should I go to the baby shower?
See. When our baby girl was born last year, we received all but one gift from any neighbor. One. And it wasn't the Pregnant Woman nor her sister-in-law. And I suspect that we even received a gift was because we gave them a gift card when their 2nd boy was born 6 months prior to Fiona was born. And the fact that we live immediately next door to each other.
We had a girl, GIRL, as in, a different gender than our first child. So yes, I feel just a bit bad about the fact that we didn't get any pink from any other neighbors.
Am I too calculative? I know I don't have to feel obligated to go, and I'm not obligated to give a gift if I don't want to. But the fact remains that the only girl in the neighborhood did not receive gifts from these people to celebrate her arrival.
And they are inviting me to attend this baby shower / asking me to bring presents covertly/discretely. Let's be honest. A baby shower is about getting stuff for the baby. I'm so cynical.
Would you get presents for them if you were me?
In the same vain of discussion, is it unethical to re-gift? Or does it depend on the gift / situation / person receiving the gift?
