A week or two ago, an online friend/acquaintance from years ago emailed me their wedding pictures. I replied with my congratulations. He then replied immediately with “so what have you been up to” or “how have you been”, something to that affect. In which case I replied with the link to our page, so he can read it instead of me repeating for the gazillionth time of our recent miscarriage.

It has now been at least one week and I have yet to hear from him.

It makes you wonder if (1) people really care, and/or (2) they don’t know what or how to say when something like this happens, or (3) they don’t really give a crap and was just asking “how are you” for the sake of asking and hoped that your answer was “fine” and nothing more, and then leave them alone.

I mean, when someone tells you a tragic/traumatic event like that, you ought to think that people have the decency to say “I’m sorry” and/or “I’m thinking of you blah blah blah”. Even if that someone is someone you barely knew–let alone that person is supposedly your friend. It takes 5 seconds to say that. Guess some people want to conserve that energy for more worthy causes.

I think people just plain don’t care.

Just like when I had the cancer diagnosis.

Or, maybe they do care and don’t want to say anything because if they did, I would be able to notice that they are damn glad that it is me and not them who’s in the shithole.

If you are similar to the aforementioned a-hole and have such traits, I would suggest you go to a store and buy some Compassion, Sympathy, and if you’re lucky, they might carry Empathy too. Trust me, in the end, it will do you some good more than it would for me.